yahar im addicted to staying up late doing shit. just listening to this music and with the rain going on and on outside you know. sometimes it takes a movie or song to get you thinking about yourself, thinking about all thats been going on with ya. it dosent make sense that you are living on something that you dont exactly plan to in your mind. you know how you think something should be done this way and thaty way but in reality you do everything differently. easier said than done eh, i think its all down to yourself. we probably should be defining ourselves at the end of every day and put it beside what we intended it to be. you know both sides of it changes all the time. because we always think and maybe do a lil bit at most, then chuck it aside. so we are back to square one. we probably should have more of these selfish individual sessions. u know think about nothing but yourself and start putting stuff into action. like maybe first try replacing "stuff" with actual things to begin with. looks like its a whole chunk of crap here, it does look like crap. but is it crap, or it turns to crap once i read it again tmr morning. nonetheless, i need a revamp. a hell lot more than my room or whatever else needs.

I'm in love with The Elephant and the Tree!!!
missed the author thing at pageone ydae... dub
someone get me that book please.


you know some things are meant to be,
doesn't mean its not important you know.
It matters a lot and you don want to let go,
but still there's this ringing voice in you that keeps telling you to do it.
so bon voyage,
wherever and whoever you may be with.

sometimes i sneer at people my age who convince themselves they are facing tremendous stress, then tell themselves encouraging and inspirational quotes which they intently allow the rest of earth to see.

c'mon WE ARE ONLY NINETEEN.

i wonder why i always start my posts with i wonder... maybe i wonder too much. but anyways writing something with a catalyst is something very nice to do if you know what i mean, i should learn from miss abel.

some posts back she said something about people wanting to be somebody else other than themselves. ya thats rather puzzling. and something even more puzzling is when people try to hide from being themselves. yeps lets not touch on the more intricate part of human psychology where u can argue that most people are doing this everyday. What puzzles me most is the blatant display of such cowardly expressions. it is something very perturbed. to myself and i hope to that person too.

nonetheless i hope it isnt him. i really hope so.

true;abel



Sometimes i wonder whether i've been true to myself and yet i come to an abrupt end, unconclusively. i did not intend to respond to that matter, which i did. I guess that sums up what you've been saying all along, that there is a undecisive part of me that i don't realise myself.


Btw, i enjoyed myself that night! Bring her again next time ;)